No Honor for Broken Warriors

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    Leonardo
    Canon

    Male
    Number of posts : 1268
    Age : 28
    Location : Undisclosed.
    Registration date : 2008-09-22

    No Honor for Broken Warriors

    Post by Leonardo on Thu May 05, 2011 2:04 pm

    So much has happen these past few months. God, I don't even know where to start. All I know, is that I've failed. Failed as a brother, a son and a leader. Most of all, I've failed myself.

    This is why I've distenced myself from the others. It's too hard for me to watch my family suffer from the injuries that I could have prevented. But not only didn't I help them, I couldn't even stay around to help them heal. I failed to protect my family and I failed to help them heal.

    This makes me not only a failure, but a coward as well.When Master Splinter returned I couldn't even face him. Though, I did worry why the Shredder let him go in the first place. Without a fight or argument. It seemed off, still does. Suspecting that something was up I decided I would leave and investigate things on my own.

    I packed a few things and left the lair. I don't think anyone really noticed that I was gone, I had been sneaking out of the lair quite often. But I left for good, Mostly to find out what was going on with the foot. Of course, as the days went on, I found it hard to focus on the task at hand, uncovering information, finding out the truth. But the foot had been quite, this would worry me for some time.

    After weeks of nothing, not even a ninja training on the rooftops, the worry that had felt left me, it was replaced once again by guilt. My mind and soul dropped into a horrible depression.I never did return home. How could I?How could I face the family that I let down? I know that Master Splinter wouldn't blame me, but the others? They would put on a brave face, say I did everything that I could.But did I really? I could have done more. I know I could have.

    The cold months were harsh, I've spent most of the time hidden away in an old green house. The green house rest on top an apartment complex. No one ever comes up here. I spent my time in meditation or feeding the many birds that gather up here. The solitude is both comforting and unnerving.

    As the warmer spring months approached, I find my thoughts drifting back to the jungle. Back to the place that I had called home for so long, and back to the woman who took my heart.Maybe I should go back there, but would she still be there? If so, would she still have the same feelings?It hasn't been that long ago...I miss her.



    Leo closed his journal and set it down beside him. He rested his pen on top the book, then pulled a picture out of his belt pocket. He looked down at it sadly. He had thought about her on and off sense leaving the jungle to come back to the city. But, being this time of year made it harder. Knowing that his brothers were with their girls made him feel that much more lonely.

    "One day, I'll come back for you. I promise." Leo tucked the picture back into his belt.

    He sat quietly, legs dangling from atop the roof. He looked down at the street and watched the cars and people go by. Seeing the happy families, made him think back to his own family. He wondered how they were doing, if they were healing well,He wondered what their mental state was. He knew that he should go back and be with them, but the shame he felt was too much. He couldn't go back.

    With a deep sigh, he let his head drop. "Worthless." He lifted his arms and reached to the back of his head. He tucked at his mask tails and slipped the blue mask off his face. He held it in front of him, examing it. A gust of wind blew past him and he opened his hands up, letting the mask fly out of his hands and into the clear sky. He watched it until it was out of sight. He wasn't worthy to wear that mask, the mask that identified him as leader, as warrior as a protector.

    He mumbled to himself and stood up, He took a step away from the edge of the building, gravel shifting under his feet. He walked over to the green house and slipped his katanas from their sheath. He leaned them against the green house.He stood there, staring at them for some time before turning to leave.

    He bent down and grabbed his journal and pen from the ground. He turned once more to his weapons. He wasn't worthy of them either. Some might say he was being too hard on himself, that it wasn't his fault. But he knew better.

    His family would understand, they would understand that he needed time to figure things out, to figure himself out. Something happen in that tower, Shredder had won. Shredder had broke him. "I'm not strong enough."

    He stood out on the very edge of the building. "I'm sorry father, my brothers. This is something that I must do. I will return, until then, please take care."

    He then turned and disappeared into the shadows.

      Current date/time is Mon Nov 20, 2017 9:43 pm